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Post by Kaz Victoria McCoy on Oct 29, 2010 22:12:55 GMT -5
Why was her life like this? Why was it she was forced to hurt someone she cared about so deeply. She bowed her head when he wrapped his arms around her, she didn't fight him. She only wished, for a moment. Wished maybe Andrew had come sooner, wished that they had a chance that she didn't have to hurt him. Because the truth was she had already hurt him, adn that hurt her inside, she wanted to turn around and kiss him, to hide herself inside of him while they both greived.. He spoke and she started to shake, holding back a sob. He was the sweetest man she'd ever met ever and he would do anything for her, but she couldn't give him what she thought he deserved, and he was suffering because of her, she'd never wanted to hurt him. She felt it okay they were naked, because she felt so naked with him, so emotionally ungaurded right now.
The kiss said everything he needed to tell her, she responded with just as much passion. Her eyes shut as he held her, tears rolling down her cheeks, as she held onto him. She gripped onto him like he was all that held her together right now he was. She stayed there, holding onto him, for a long few moments, getting her shaking under control, when she did her eyes opened and she stared at him. Her hands that'd been around his neck, cupped his cheek, and she brushed away some tears as she swallowed looking at him. "I want you Andy." she admitted again. Her voice cracked as she said the next part "I want this. Us." she'd been smiling, but it just crumpled away like she'd been hit in the gut, like she couldn't stand anymore. She looked at him.
She kissed his lips, not even trying for soft this time, it was hard needed, as she held herself into him. Tried to become with him, his body and hers basically meeting, they were both needing each other. She broke the kiss and her voice broke again as fresh tears rolled down her cheeks. "But I can't give you a fair chance with Kai around," she admitted. She looked at him, if she was someone else, she would say they could meet on the side, but she didn't want to lead him on like that. "God why do you have to be so good Andrew?" she asked but she didn't expect an answer as she laid her head on his chest, she listned to his heart, she wanted to hold that heart, to hide inside of it, to be with Andrew, but she wanted to give him a chance, and she didn't know if she'd ever be able. I love you Andrew, the words came out of her mouth, she slipped away from him, taking one step back and looking down, "But he was here first" just like that it was as if she'd summoned them, she was sure he could see the invisible chain Kai had placed around her.
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Post by Andrew James Moore on Oct 30, 2010 14:09:01 GMT -5
Everything with her, this moment, him and her, was perfect and yet perfectly broken. They both were broken, even if he did not show it before the tears were shed. He had been broken for a while because he had loved her for a while, yet she was starring in someone else’s heart. He could not do anything except stay here with her, or try to before it was his last hope. His hands did not let her go, they rested on her hips, but were wound around her back. As she whispered those words, he wanted to smile, but he couldn’t because there was a catch, a silence that was to be replaced by a but. He didn’t have to say anything, he knew what she was going to say before she said it. He looked back at her, her eyes sad, compassionate, yet completely broken. He held back his tears now and wished that she could see through this.
The kiss like the one given by Judas to Jesus, was a betrayal in a sense. The whole situation could fit into this moment, but he knew that he would move on. Well, maybe not, but he hoped he would. He still did not say anything as she rested her head on his chest. He brushed his fingers through her hair and just stood there. Then when she stepped back and said what she did, he wanted to be angry, but he couldn’t. He just cried and slowly took one step back, opening his mouth to say something, a small sound coming out but nothing else. He just walked away into the main room, around the wall and sank to his knees, his back against the wall and just let the tears fall. His hand covered his eyes as he didn’t move, just fell apart. It wasn’t fair.
She didn’t even have to say anything but that she would never give him a chance. It was that that ripped his heart apart piece by piece. He never cried like this, he was always the strong one, but he couldn’t be, he couldn’t even try. He felt like a little boy wanting to be wrapped up in his mother’s arm. He loved her so much and he felt now he should not have tried because he knew he had been setting himself up for failure. He was naked now, exposed in every way. Especially emotionally. His fingers tips dug into his palms and he squeezed out of hurt.
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