Will you light my candel?{Andy

[Kaz Victoria McCoy]

Outfit

She stood in front of her cloest, wrapped in one of her yellow fluffy towels while she stared inside looking around for what to wear. She didn't know why she cared, Kaz didn't usually care about what she wore all that much, she liked her military style, and her colors, but this morning she just stood there in front of her closet, her wet hair sending shivers down her spine. She was more distracted by the thoughts of what she wasn't wearing then what she was going to wear. She was going to start wearing a ring now, Kai had asked her to marry him, and she'd said yes, so that meant ring, she thought. As she looked down at her hands she knew she'd never wear it there,but she thought on a chain around her neck, hidden with other necklaces in front of it. She didn't even have the ring yet and she was thinking about how to hide it, what type of girl was she, didn't girls like to show off the rings, but she didn't want one, she didn't want to look the doom of rings in the face on her hands or on her body.

Finally she grew cold enough it didn't matter what she was giong to wear, so she threw some things on not thinking about anything. She wasn't supposed to fight today so she could weaar anything, she had clothes in her bag if she stopped by the gym, right now she just wanted out of her house. Out of her head, and thoughts, she wanted to not think anymore. Running could be the key, but that would only send her into her thoughts about Kai more, she didn't want to think about Kai about last night, when she'd been with him, how she'd thought about Andrew. Her stomach went into knots at his name, Andrew, she closed her eyes what was she going to do with him after yesterday? She opened her door, and wound up at the park without thinking where she was going. She'd gotten herself some coffee, but her thoughts were about Andrew, about kissing him, how it'd felt to be with him, how after that Kai wasn't the same. She swallowed some, trying to figure out if she wanted to think, or just forget everything, did she want to figure this out of hope for the best. She walked around staring at the sky, "someone give me a sign" she said with a sigh.

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[Andrew James Moore]

Andrew was once again running his soul out because he needed to block his thoughts out. There was no denying that this activity was becoming a bit of a habit. A healthy one but still a habit to run away from the fact that he ached from the time he had with Kaz. Everytime he thought about what happened, it made something in him ache all over again, so here he was, his feet padding against the ground, no shirt, just shorts on. His well toned chest and abdomen had a small layer of sweat glistening upon his skin. His breath came out in steady as the surroundings seemed to be blurred away by his set concentration. He had lost some weight since the last time he had been around Kaz because overall he had not taken care of himself, he had not cared to take care of himself, but he was not all that different.

Speaking of which he had not been around for a while, not even stepped foot into an area where he would see Kaz and he thought it would ultimately be better for him if he didn’t come back for a while. He just wanted her to forget, to be fine without him. And he heard someone talking and thought he heard Kaz’s voice and his eyebrows furrow. “Great…now I’m going crazy too.” He sighed, stopping and stood there, tears stinging his eyes, but he didn’t let them fall. He was determined to not let them haunt him again because he’s spent most of his time trying to figure out how to get past this. Now he was considering not coming back, to leaving the Tigers because he didn’t know if he could anymore. He didn’t even really have a place there. No one really was attached to him and although he was in the important position of second in command, no one really got close to him and Kai hated him, but he always figured it was partially a dominance issue. He sighed and realized how alone he was now, he just ran his fingers through his wet hair, the cool air attacking his skin.

[Kaz Victoria McCoy]

A cold wind blew threw the park, and Kaz shivered a little bit. Her fingers clenched her coffee a little harder, trying to steal it's warmth, while her other hand became numb to the cold. Winter was coming quickly it seemed to her, the days were already darker and she didn't dare wear shorts anymore outside of the club and gym. Looking down at her hand she thought about the numb state she'd left the park the last time she'd been here, with Andrew. When he'd kissed her, her heart clentched as she thought about that, those desperate kisses she'd stolen in the locker room were haunting her. Every moment she thought about him, the more the giant Andrew shaped hole in her heart throbbed. She missed him, more than she would ever admit, she felt unstable without Andrew by her side, she needed him. She had Kai, but she needed them both.

She sighed, trying to find some air in the park, everything felt so crowded in the dark. Her thoughts never took a break. "Andrew..." she whispered his name. Closing her eyes, she pressed her nails into her palm, she took some more steps trying to find somewhere without them. "Where are you," she asked the wind, as if it would carry her thoughts to him. Until she ended up seeing him. There he was, she was nearly shaking when she saw him. He'd been haunting her thoughts since she'd seen him and here he was. "Andrew.." she said his name and moved towards him. She was confused but so happy to see him, why was she so drawn to him lately? She didn't know, all she knew was she wanted to touch him the moment she'd seen him, Kai was forgotten when he was around. "What are you doing?" she asked him.

[Andrew James Moore]

Suddenly, he froze at her voice, and he wanted someone to pinch him to see if she was actually there. His muscles grew all tense and he just turned around and blinked at her. “I’m run—n-ning.” He spoke out as he watched her. He grew all quiet and looked at her, rings under his eyes. “What about you?” he whispered and just wondered if she even cared about him. He looked away from her to hide the pain that stood within him, the fact that she left him for Kai. He knew he had to explain himself for being away, but he didn’t want to, he wanted not to have to lie about this. He just wanted to slip away in the middle of the night and never come back because it hurt so much. He looked at her and saw her happiness and wondered what made her so happy.

“I’m sorry I haven’t been around.” He spoke softly, again wanting to reach out and just pull her in. His mind glitched to when they were in the shower at the gym and they were breaking. He felt a tug at his heart and he wanted to say that he missed her that he loved her. But he knew he couldn’t. He opened his mouth almost giving into that temptation, but he stopped himself, only a small sound coming out. Instead he filled it with some question, “How have you been?” He asked her looking into her eyes, again showing everything without having to say it. He wanted her, missed her, and he was being strong for her sake and Kai’s sake. He didn’t want her to be miserable in all of this.

[Kaz Victoria McCoy]

She could feel it under her breast, the feeling of her heart skipping a beat after she knew it was him. Her heart didn't feel so giddy in a moment though, when he turned around. He looked awful, the bags under his eyes, made her want to cuddle with him, take care of him. "Andrew," she crossed over to him without thinking, she'd heard him ask her something, say sorry, but she didn't care. She cupped his cheek with her hand, the bags under his eyes scared her. "Are you okay?" she asked concern written all over her face, she was worried about him. She'd been thinking about him nonstop, when she thought she'd see him though, she didn't think he'd look like this.
She looked down when she heard it in his voice, dropping her hand though it made her heart tense, and shoulders. She mentally flinched when she pulled away from him, she didn't want to take herself away from him, but had she done this. "I've been worried about you, I haven't seen you." she hadn't seen him since they'd been in the shower together. She thought about that and a blush covered her cheeks as she thought and looked back at him. "You should take better care of yourself." she touched his side, he was thin. Without thinking she grabbed his hand, "Come on I'll treat you, you look like you could eat." she said with a smile. A real geuine smile, a smile from being around him, being with him, she only wanted him in this moment, to be with him somewhere.

[Andrew James Moore]

When she asked if he was okay, his lower lip quivered for a moment and he couldn’t look at her. A tear fell down his cheek, but she turned away too fast to see it or to really let him say anything. He knew instantly she was worried about him, worried that he wouldn’t keep himself in proper health, worried that she might have hurt him. He wanted to ask why she had walked up to him when she wanted Kai over him. Why she thought he would be okay…He was a little angry in the back of his mind, but he couldn’t be at her. He just couldn’t get mad with her. “I just have been running a lot.” He said his words having two meanings behind them: which meant he was running physically and running away from the problem.

He just followed her and grasped her hand. He was afraid of her letting go of him forever. He looked at his feet, as though he was watching where he was walking. “I need to go back to my apartment. I need clothes.” He whispered, knowing they wouldn’t just allow him to sit there without a shirt. “Please?” He asked her and looked to her hoping she would come with. He wanted her here, and in the small back of his heart he hoped with her here, he might get through this better than the past few days. He didn’t know if he could handle this alone, she was his best friend to him right now. He didn’t keep close ties with people for this reason because he didn’t want to get hurt. He would be part of the gang, a family, but even with them he was slightly more distant.

[Kaz Victoria McCoy]

Andrew was down, she could see it all over him. In his face, the way he stood, his voice, his body. She didn't know why but that sent shivers and panic down her spine. Something inside of her told her that she needed to fix this she needed him, she needed Andrew, needed to make him happy, to see him happy. The words about food, taking him out they all came out without her mind knowing what was happening. All she knew was she wanted to be with him, to see him smile that beautiful smile, her heart was in pieces and seeing him, something inside of her told her that if she held it together and stuck with him it'd all be better.

She nodded her head, smiling at him, there was no other thought in her mind for a moment. Before she touched his abs, "I think you look fine," she smiled at him before lowering her hand, she laced his fingers with hers. "I'll go wherever you want" she smiled at him, trying to smile. She looked at him, feeling in her heart the space that needed him. "But you have to promise me something" she said looking at him. Her eyes connected with his, "You have to smile for me Andy." childish but it was what she needed from him.

[Andrew James Moore]

He smiled wide when she said that she needed him to smile. It wasn’t hard to get him to smile even during rough times because there was a lot of room for comfort. He looked at her and felt her hand lace with his and he felt pieces being glued together again. Even with simple of actions, it healed. She was the key or at least anyone who showed love to him or wiggled into his heart did. But he had never really loved someone before and it was a much more complicated thing to him. He thought back to what she said about him looking fine and he wondered if she noticed the bruises that were fading from the fights he got in when he first came away from their meeting in the shower. He wondered if she noticed how thin he was, but he knew she knew. Women always tended to know or notice these things about the people they loved, at least Kaz seemed to.

“Can you stay for a while?” He whispered and looked down at her. “I missed you.” He continued and just walked with her to the apartment that was only a few blocks away. He opened the door for her and guided her down the hall to his room. He opened it having left it unlocked like he usually did because people were usually pretty good about not stealing your stuff. The first room they came across was his living room, although small, it was nice. And he didn’t live messy because he was never home so he really doesn’t have to clean much. The only thing that was messy was his bed. “You can take a look around if you wanted or just have a seat. I have to go change quick.” He said softly as he closed the door behind her, heading into his bedroom, almost closing it all the way but accidently leaving it open a crack.

[Kaz Victoria McCoy]

His fingers fit perfect with hers. Kaz thought about all of those stupid little things that talked about how someones hand fit so well with theres, now holding his hand she under stood those. They fit like some puzzel or code she'd just broken, being with Andrew it always made her feel like that. Like she was noticing things that were right in her face, like her feelings for him, but she didn't feel stupid about it, she felt happy, smiling, because here he was still with her, Andrew was still here with her, they moved threw the park and went to his house, she didn't say anything, just relaxed and her heart pumping because they were together. Why weren't things always easy like this.

She walked into his apartment, not thinking about anything. Letting go of his hand when she had to though she didn't want to. Kaz looked around this was were her second lived, she stared around, moving down until she saw where he walked in, she pushed open the door, and moved over to his bed. "You don't have to close the door Andy. I have seen you naked before," she said blushing as she remembered the shower, she blushed yet a tingling sensation went threw her as she remembered. She touched his chest, and frowned at the healing brusies. "Take better care of yourself," she said her fingers touching them, running over the smooth skin. She didn't notice she was pressing into him nearly, she was just looking at his skin, remembering what it felt like to be pressed against him. 'Andrew" she said his name softly, she looked at him, "I missed you," before leaning in and kissing him

[Andrew James Moore]

Before he knew it she was in his room, not far from him and only seeming to gravitate closer. He laughed at her words and her blush and his smile slowly disappeared as she seemed to explore his skin, his body. Then when she spoke his name his eyes connected with hers and then their lips met and he kissed her only gently like they did before, but he kissed her a little deeper and slipped his arms around her, one around her waist, the other resting on the small of her back. He pulled back from the kiss and whispered, “I missed you too.” He smiled softly as he looked into her eyes, one of his hands coming up into her hair while lightly resting on her cheek. He stood with her there for a moment, just staring into her eyes searching for something but he wasn’t sure what that was. He wanted to say something but he had a feeling he didn’t have to.

But there was one thing he hadn’t said before, something she did. “I love you, Kaz.” He whispered pulling her lips into a kiss now, this time a deep kiss without any lead in of a gentle one. Andrew didn’t even feel hurt in this moment as though it was forgotten. And he hadn’t even realized this yet, but all he could do was keep her there in his arms.

[Kaz Victoria McCoy]

Kaz had kissed Kai only last night, but when she'd kissed him, it'd been nothing. There had been nothing behind the kiss, nothing like when her lips pressed against Andrews. Their kiss started out sweet, her lips against his, felt like nothing else, like she could breath, she felt like she was sinking into him, in love with the feeling of his lips against hers. There was nothing awkward about the kiss, when it was over, she couldn't get the smile off her face, she kept her eyes closed, just wrapped up in with him, happiness poured over her body like something warm. Nothing needed to be said with them, they didn't have to say anything about how amazing it was to touch each other, to be together, she'd missed him, and his body being with him. She touched his arms, running her nails over his arms, until they came to the small of his back where she scratched his back. '

Everything was forgotten when he said those words. Every ounce of pain she'd been exposed to these past few weeks was gone erased. He loved her, and while she'd thought she knew that and she knew she loved him, it was something incredible to hear it. When the kiss was over, she sucked on her lower lip, staying in his arms, she closed her eyes trying to resist tears. "Andrew" she said his name, it camed out choked when she said it, before she opened her eyes. "I love you" she told him, touching him, she kissed him again deeply, before pulling away and sighing. She'd missed him so much, she could feel the butterflies in her stomach. She smirked, "Why are you always topless," she teased him. She didn't care, but this time they both had more clothes on, she'd only shead her jacket. She kissed his neck, she couldn't get enough of him. She wanted him more and more.

[Andrew James Moore]

That smile was what he needed, she didn’t open her eyes at first, but it was all he needed right now. To know she was happy when she was with him. There was something perfect about being with her like this, something irreplaceable. Then after he said that he loved her he could tell she was tearing up and he just pulled her in closer as she kissed him, only returning the passionate kiss. Then when she pulled away he only wanted to grab her right back into his arms. And he laughed at her comment, “Well, maybe you need to stop sneaking up on me when I’m shirtless.” He teased her back and watched her with a grin, not a smile, a grin. He hadn’t smiled like this since he saw her last. He felt her kiss his neck and he just closed his eyes and enjoyed the touch of her. Slowly and gently he picked her up bridal style, his frame still strong. He sat down on his bed and laid back, setting her next to him and just watched her for the longest moment.

His hand slipped over to hers and interlaced his fingers with hers. “Don’t let go of me.” He whispered as he smiled softly and leaned in and kissed her. “Because I’ll always hold onto you.” He wanted her, wanted to be with her. He would go all the way with her if she wanted to, but he wasn’t going to get mad or upset if she didn’t want to. He was enjoying laying there right now, just watching her. Andrew really had a gentle spirit, he could be tough which was most days, but he also was very kind. Especially with Kaz because she was his soft spot.

[Kaz Victoria McCoy]

She grinned at him when he spoke, he was smiling too. She touched his stomach, rubbing one of his abs, and grinning. "Now why would I do something like that?" she asked him, coming up and stealing a kiss. "When this always leads to kissing you," kissing him, just what she always wanted. "Besides you have a great body," she kissed his neck again, when he took care of himself he looked even better, but he was always a fantastic man, and his body was always nice. She laughed and giggled when he picked her up like that she wasn't expecting him to do that. She bit her lip and dug her head into the crook of his neck even more when he did. She smiled as he put her on the bed with him, she laid a little bit away from him, relaxing as she laid there looking at him, she couldn't explain the feeling that she had when they laid together.

Her happy mood slipped away a little bit when he he asked her that, was he really sscared that she was going to leave him? She shook her head, "mm mm," she mummbled, looking at him. "I don't want to loose you Andrew" she said looking at him, maybe more honest then she'd ever been with him. "I'm scared you'll leave," she squeezed his hand, she closed her eyes as she did, opening them as she bit her lip nearly hard enough to draw blood. She moved on the bed, crawling over so she could be closer to him, she snuggled into his body. She wanted to kiss him, but she didn't she just wanted to hold on to him for a moment. "I don't know what I'd do if you left me."

[Andrew James Moore]

Andrew had an answer to her question of why she would do that. Because of Kai. He didn’t want to say it and he kind of hoped she caught on to what she was trying to say. As she said what she did, he smiled softly . As she came over, he opened his arms to her and wrapped her up in them. “I think you would be strong like you usually are dear.” He whispered into her hair as he gently kissed the top of her head while rubbing her back. He really wondered if something was wrong with her and Kai because she came to him today. But he figured she would tell him when she was ready. He liked this moment, just being close, yet being relaxed and not having to move. No words needed to be said, not right now even though he probably would. “I don’t know what I would do without you.” He whispered thinking about how he had been living the past few days just because of the whole shower scene.

He smiled as he remembered the first few moments they had been in the shower together and he laughed softly. “Remember when you came into the shower the other day….” He blushed then and shivered then at remembering her teasing him. He loved her and every part of her personality. Slowly he lifted a hand to gently raise her chin as he leaned in and kissed her deeply. He came to mumble the words against her lips, “You know you are completely amusing, sexy, awesome, and the best woman that has ever walked this earth and I love every part of you.” He smirked as he looked down into her eyes, kissing once more.

[Kaz Victoria McCoy]

A smile fell onto her face as his arms came around her. He was warm, like safety, when she was with him she felt like everything was okay, snuggling in his arms was just making sure. She smiled when she was there until he spoke, she thought about it for a mnute and shook her head, "Nope" she replied, putting her arms around his neck, she wouldn't be strong, she wasn't able, Andrew was part of her strength, having him backing her up. "I'd miss you to much," she said. Even though he whispered she could hear him speaking, she closed her eyes, part of her thought about pulling up her knees, hugging them and shielding herself from Andrew so he wouldn't see that thinking about a life without him made her cry, she bit her lip. "Then don't leave," she whispered back to him.

She blushed as he brought up the shower, how could she forget something like that. Telling one of her best friends she loved them, and kissing him. She'd been thinking about it for days, as she did she got the same reaction she'd been having every time she thought about it. Butterflies, they'd been released inside of her stomach, she didn't open her mouth for a moment, expecting one to fly out when she did. It wasn't hard to not open her lips when they were kissing she looked at him, and smiled, a tear in her eye. She didn't believe a word he said about her, she ran her hands threw his hair comforting herself with the action. She looked at him, and swallowed. "Andy." she murmmered. Kissing him quickly, she thought to give her time to think of a proper reaction, but she couldn't think when she kissed him, except when she kissed him. She closed her eyes as she kissed him deeply, needingly, she tried to block out everything, but she couldn't, a tear slid down her cheek when she kissed him. "We shouldn't be doing this," she said when she was done, her stomach felt awful when she did, and her throat felt like his hands were cutting off her air. She bowed her head, she should tell him, but she couldn't, she was so scared of loosing him, of loosing both of them, what was she supposed to do, she loved them both. While she thought Andy might be taking over her heart at an alarming rate, she couldn't have Kai being with Ivy, or away from her, she didn't function without him. But Andrew held her together, she barried her head in the crook of his neck, trying to hide her face. "I love you too much" she whispered.